Yuk.

OK, that last post was nasty.

I was pretty drunk when I posted it – but the sentiments were real. I’ve always been quite a heavy drinker – sometimes a couple of nights a week, sometimes four or five, depending on how I’m feeling – with occasional longer binges, and occasional breaks of weeks at a time. But it’s not until the past couple of weeks that it’s begun to put me into such seriously horrible moods.

There’s nothing really that’s changed, that I can think of, other than a bit of extra pressure at work, but hey – I’ve been dealing with it for years, that’s no good reason for me to be slipping into depressive funks.

I think it’s time for a break from my life. I’ve applied for holidays, which will start in three weeks or so – somehow I have to get myself through until then. Not sure how – just keep looking ahead, I guess.

I almost decided to leave Whirlpool and the internet for a little while, to try and get some perspective on things – but decided that would be too damn hard, and also fairly pointless since I have nothing better to do at the moment. What I need to do is to find something better to do – which might enable me to spend more time away from the ‘net and finding some fulfillment in other areas.

Sorry I’ve made a dick of myself lately.

Honestly. I’m better than the way I’ve been behaving.